Anonymous sources
The Spoof (satire)
Romney Revealed to be Bully From the Karate Kid - The Spoof (satire)
In an interview today, a former classmate who asked to remain anonymous--he will be referred to here as R. Macchio--recounted a series of disturbing encounters with the former Massachusetts governor. "It was like he made it his mission in life to ...
"Chico de Mayo was a friend of mine," says Romney! - The Spoof (satire)
An anonymous source within the campaign confided to a reporter that Ann Romney became physically ill upon learning of the release. The video was pulled from the web site. Politico has published the contents of the comments. "Buenas Dias my friends from ...
Ted Nugent considered as GOP Vice Presidential candidate - The Spoof (satire)
I took the document to my confidential source within Goldman Sachs, who, while refusing to either confirm or deny that the document was the work of a Goldman Sachs team, agreed to meet me for cocktails later and comment off the record.
Oprah Fires Rosie, Then Does Dance! - The Spoof (satire)
"Those were crocodile tears", stated the Source who did not want to be identified fearing being black-listed. "She even grabbed a guy who was cleaning up and danced him all over the room. I guess he was a janitor." According to the Source, ...
Breitbart Secret Revealed - The Spoof (satire)
An anonymous source at the Breitbart camp tells us that it is a video of Mr. Obama singing, "Iffff heee could seeeee me now, my grand pa An-dro--pov, he'd be so proud of my achievements, . . . . . .", all the while his jaw mechanism is being oiled by a ...
Bombing for Peace - The Spoof (satire)
'The only way to get Peace is to go to War' announced a world leader who has asked not to be named, in case someone decides to bump him off. This was capped by George Unwell who remarked that 'War is Peace', explaining how peaceful the world would be ...
Scotland independence bid is scam to boost UK Eurovision chances - The Spoof (satire)
The insider who refused to be named said that the plan is for Scotland to get independence, eventually followed by Wales and Northern Ireland. This will result in separate Eurovision Song Contest entries, and allow each of the 'home nations' to vote ...
World comes to halt as news of Whitney Houston death emerges - The Spoof (satire)
An Egyptian who asked not to be named told the spoof "We have to look at the bigger picture here - Whitney was the Queen of the power ballad - is our struggle for democracy in our country after years of corrupt leadership really that significant in ...
Congress Strikes Back: Gives Taxpayers a 4% Approval Rating - The Spoof (satire)
"Taxpayers are doing a terrible job of providing the House and the Senate with the resources we need to run America correctly," said one prominent Senator who asked to remain anonymous. "You ask us: 'where are the jobs?' We're asking you: 'where is the ...
Met office backs down- Snow melted - The Spoof (satire)
"I thought we would be having a few days off" said a disgruntled employee who refused to be named. The train drivers union confirmed that drivers were planning to strike if they did not get at least a week off due to severe weather.
Con dems 50% reduction in ghost and spectre budget - The Spoof (satire)
One ghost who refused to be named, had this to say. "last year i could just about scrape up enough for a threatening mist and some orbs, if the kids skipped a meal. Now I dunno what were gonna do" Another spook the grey lady who allegedly killed her ...
Goldman Sachs to Give Away $100 Trillion - The Spoof (satire)
"Wait until EVERYbody's a millionaire," said one GS employee, who asked to remain anonymous. "The public will finally understand that money doesn't solve all your problems." Exact details of the giveaway are still be worked out, but Goldman Sachs will ...
Paedophile found guilty... of being awesome! - The Spoof (satire)
Today a convicted Devonshire paedophile, who has asked to remain anonymous, was recently labeled 'awesome' by a group of fans, who have been camping outside his house and filming his hilarious antics Jackass-style for the last 14 days. ...
Carl Crawford: Lost in Translation or Among the Missing - The Spoof (satire)
If the Yankees have him, they can keep him-so said some anonymous Red Sox sources who declined to be named. Like the Lindbergh baby, this bonus baby of baseball seems to have vanished. Whatever happened to Baby Jane is a question that only scratches at ...
Killer confessions: Woe For Wogan - The Spoof (satire)
He is currently detained by Thames Valley police who have been following his movements very closely for some months, and finally decided to break cover following a tip from an anonymous source. Wogan, who described himself as a "man of fine moral ...
George Michael Uses Public Lavatory To Urinate In Sensation - The Spoof (satire)
"You could have knocked me down with a feather to be honest" said Harry Nesbitt 47 of 56 Clarendon Street NW1 who asked to remain anonymous. "He walked in as bold as brass, stood at the pisser, had a quick whizz and then just shook the drips off and ...
Miley Cyrus Angrily Declares That The Bob Marley Birthday Cake Does Not Prove ... - The Spoof (satire)
One of the party guests, who refused to give her name, said that the birthday cake did look like it could have been Landau Eugene Murphy, Jr., because of the dreadlocks and of course the fact that the face decoration was a black guy. ...
Christina Aguilera Denies That She Is Pregnant And Blames Her Weight Gain On A ... - The Spoof (satire)
When asked who the player was she refused to give his name. [EDITOR'S NOTE: The players name is Skyler McScorpion and he is only 19.] Make Abel Rodriguez's day - give this story five thumbs-up (there's no need to register, the thumbs are just down ...
Chelsea Handler Denies The Rumors About Her and Avowed Lesbian Melissa Etheridge - The Spoof (satire)
The unknown museum goer who refused to give her name stressed that Chelsea was allegedly making moaning type sounds as she stared intently at the three particular wax figures. She also spent quite a lot of time looking at the wax figure of noted ...
Another hole due to farting - The Spoof (satire)
Two people who refused to be named said, "It's a great place to meet people and unwind, as long as our partners don't find out its fine. As for the ozone, if we stopped drinking it wouldn't matter, millions of people drink, how else do you think babies ...
Lindsay Lohan Who Was To Serve A 30-Day Jail Sentence Is Released After Only ... - The Spoof (satire)
Miss San Guacamole spoke with the warden, who refused to give his name, and asked him why he had decided to release the Hollywood actress when he had thousands of other female convicts that he could have released in her place instead. ...
Sarah Palin Stages Coup Within Michele Bachmann's Campaign Headquarters - The Spoof (satire)
Insiders, speaking on the condition of anonymity, told us that Bachmann was Gadhafi surprised when an army of women busted through her office doors wearing Scream masks while smoking Cohiba cigars. One eyewitness described the event as 'the strangest ...
Amanda Knox To Appear On The New TV Show "Pan-Am" Before It Flies Away To 'The ... - The Spoof (satire)
A spokesperson for the Pan-Am series who refused to give his name stated that Miss Knox will portray Chloe Butterhill an American exchange student who travels to Florence, Italy to study the art of wine ingredients at Italy's famed Universita Vino ...
Obama Demands NBA Must "Pass this New Contract RIGHT NOW!" - The Spoof (satire)
Said a long term Owner who spoke off the record, "Hey...we're a F***g business, not the government...if you don't want to work fine, but just don't expect us to keep paying your bills, health care and pension contribution every week...this isn't the ...
France Mourns Day Of Civility - The Spoof (satire)
A Gendarme, who asked not to be named, wept as he told reporters that he was ashamed to go home to his wife and child knowing that he had not needlessly battered any of his fellow citizens, nor snubbed any pleas for directions from law-abiding tourists ...